I was once a grade conscious student. When I was in high
school, I always have high grades. I am one of the popular girls who's known
to be a smart girl. My teachers supported me. They helped me to excel more.
Because of these, my parents expected more from me. Since I was an honor
student back then, they wanted me to study hard and achieve more. But things
changed when I first stepped in college. I was in a culture shock. I thought
everyone's smarter than me, that I was less of a person. I seldom get high
grades. I became an ordinary girl. Nobody notices me. I want to have a
professor who can see my potential ... but I became an invisible girl. College is
depressing for me. I study hard but I don’t know why I think it’s still not enough.
I want the old Micah who achieved many things. But I don’t know how, since many
people are smarter and more popular than me. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t want
to be a popular girl. I just want to be that girl of the past who doesn’t worry
about her grades just because it’s easy for her to get it. Do you get me?
Hahaha. Pero hindi nga naman nakukuha ang lahat ng bagay nang madalian.
But something changed my perspective. I watched the concert
of Planetshakers, a Christian group, with my friends last August 14, 2015. We bought
tickets last March 2015. When we bought the tickets, I didn’t expect that it
will fall on the day of the start of class. My class is also at night and apparently, that is a legit reason for me not to attend the concert. This worried me too much. But I decided to just attend the concert and skip class. Something worried me again. There will be a quiz on our
major subject. I don’t know what to do. I consulted my friends. I prayed. Then
I finally made my choice. I decided to ditch our class. It boggled me for
many days. My mind keeps telling me to attend class because it’s school of course and school is important for me, but my heart keeps telling me to go to the concert. God wants
me to experience His love. It’s a once in a lifetime opportunity. I will be in
school for 10 months but God wants me to be there just for a day. That made my
decision to attend the concert. While in the concert, my classmate texted me.
The quiz was recorded. But that didn’t mind me that day 'coz I was praising
God that time and I know that God will not leave me in that situation.
I don’t know why but starting that day, my perspective about
grades changed me. Now, I started to trust God more. Grades didn’t matter too much
for me. It matters in a sense that I also need to pass but having low grades
didn’t matter to me. One time we had a quiz. I studied but I failed. I studied
with effort seriously. I rewrite my notes just to remember the terms. It’s
quite depressing to know that you studied but you failed. But nah. I don’t know
but it didn’t matter too much. In my mind, as long as I learned, as long as I
did my part, as long as I studied for that subject, nothing wrong will happen
to me. I realized that grades really do not matter. Learning does matter. I
learned from my low grades. I learned from my mistakes, and I know that these mistakes will
help me in the future and I know that God has a plan for me that He is already
there in the future. I don't have to worry. I just need to do my part as
a student and God will do His part.
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